They say that nothing is ever simple. And that’s been the story of the last couple of Sundays (my MTX day) for me. Sunday of Week 4 was pretty good … if you don’t count the two feet of snow that fell the day before. Sunday of Week 5 was pretty nasty … but not really because of the MTX.
I’m still finding that the ginger nearly eliminates the nausea. And that MTX makes me a bit more tired than usual.
But the biggest lesson over the last two weeks has been what my limits are. The snowstorms of February 2010 taught me that I may be able to do something I used to do (like shovel snow for an hour), but that the price I will pay is a steep one. And because I work in a business where happy clients are essential to my livelihood, it’s been a challenge to figure out how to reschedule people and not hurt myself even further.
I have had alternating days of great accomplishment and productivity. Followed almost immediately by days of incredible fatigue and frustration. But somehow this still feels like an improvement.
Last summer when the RA hit my life with full force, I had a very simple rule. Do only what is necessary and take it very slow. My main symptom was overwhelming fatigue. I did have some joint pain, but it was 20% of the issue while fatigue was 80%.
Then when I began to take medicines for the RA, the rules changed. The fatigue levels are improving markedly, and actually that is making it harder. I find that I can do more, but that this is making the pain levels go up quite a bit. So, the new rule seems to be do whatever I can one day but don’t forget I will pay for it the next day with exhaustion and discomfort. And if I go really nuts, I WILL be in pain.
My big challenge seems to be finding a balance of accomplishment and recovery. MTX day / Sunday seems to fit well as a recovery day. However, I clearly need more than one recovery day in the week. This is a very new concept for me … and one that will be another part of this luscious journey.